Spiritual Relationship

Chapter One of My Guru, My Guide - A Story of Spiritual Relationship and Psychic Awakening

And so my story begins.

"One sunny afternoon, when I was about six years of age, as I walked down the hill that led to my family home I received what I remember to be my very first psychic message and vision.

The sky overhead was clear blue, and seemed to stretch forever. I was called to listen, as if the sky itself was about to speak. With utter simplicity and compassion, a voice spoke in my mind, and I was shown a vision.

In my infancy I learned that life was painful, and in response I developed a pattern of pulling back from relationship and life. The One who spoke to me that day, showed me that my withdrawal was seen and understood. I perceived that One as a Source of infinitely expanded Love which seemed to pervade all things.

Wonder and relief flooded through me, to receive this most beautiful Communication, and to receive the compassionate understanding and acceptance of withdrawing into myself. This One also reflected that through my withdrawing, my heart would close down, and cause pain and difficulty in my life. However I was given the loving assurance that the One who spoke would assist my regaining heart openness.

To receive this loving support, and to experience the radiant Source of it, offered great happiness and strength. Though I could not have verbalized it at the time I had beheld and spoken with a force of Divinity. This Gift was life transforming, and from the moment I received it, I felt an unspoken inner knowledge that Divine Being was the very heart of existence, and was mysteriously engaged in my life. By this Grace, I was utterly relieved to feel that I would emotionally survive the ordeal that life was proving to be. The promise to be healed of both the act and the effects of my closing down inspired a faith in the Divine Source and spiritual relationship with that One which persisted through my childhood and has never left me. This faith offered far greater support and help through all of the difficult years of my life than any other single force or relationship."

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I 'found' my Guru twenty-one years later at the age of twenty-seven, after receiving a prophetic dream that Divine and spiritual relationship would soon enter my life and change it completely. He showed me that He was the One who had come to me in my childhood, offering the gift of spiritual relationship, and the reassurance that I would receive help to overcome the effects of my separative patterns. In fact He revealed to me then, that there was no separation and so the relationship was inherent.

Again from Chapter one, these paragraphs describe my first meeting with my Spiritual Teacher, through reading one of His books...

"On reading the very first paragraph I was overwhelmed in a rush of awe and joy. Intuitively I recognized that this book was written by one who was not separate from the Divine Source. Without a single doubt, I knew that I had found the Being who had ... spoken to me through spiritual relationship and psychic communication that I’d received as a small child."

I felt in a sudden and exhilarating moment that my Guru had appeared. This was the very One who offered compassionate understanding of my withdrawal from life and love, and had promised Divine Help, spiritual relationship and guidance when I was a small child. He was the One, whose revelation of the Divine unity of all things had awakened a depth of faith which permeated my entire life. This One, whose love for me and for all beings radiated from the pages of this beautiful book, was my Guru! There was no doubt in me. With all of my heart I knew this to be true. I felt an unspoken yet obvious spiritual relationship with the extraordinary man who had written this book.

More profoundly happy than I’d ever felt before, I offered my thanks, with all of my heart, to him. It was clear to me that the Help that was promised had tangibly come into my life. My journey to recovery of self had truly begun."

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The book that I opened on the train was The Way That I Teach written by a man with an unusual name, Bubba Free John. (This was one of Adi Da Samraj's earlier Spiritual Names.

This quote from The Way That I Teach describes that moment exactly.

“Whoever loves in the present is not bound. This is the Law. Where there is love there is release of karma, or the effects of the past. To love is to be ‘forgiven’ or to be released from past unlove and the destiny past unlove creates through accumulated reactions and tendencies established by past experience. To love is to be happy or Radiant as the whole body to Infinity. In this manner, the past, in the form of mental, emotional, and physical tendencies, will not be dramatized. The past becomes unnecessary through love. Love is primal freedom.Love is the supreme science of life. It is Communion with the Real, the very Divine. It is the principle of transformation, of moral and spiritual healing and growth, of meditation, of Realization.”

Click here to read My Guru, My Guide - Introduction and Chapter One, Spiritual Relationship. This link will download a pdf file to your website. The file is titled, 'mgmgch1.pdf'.


Chapter One, Spiritual Relationship describes -

- The vision and communication of spiritual relationship that I received as a child, and how my life developed over the years before finding my Guru.

- The prophetic dream and finding my Guru. What it was like to find Him, how everything in my life changed.

- The life that I chose, in response to the instructions of Adi Da Samraj, and how my devotional relationship with Him developed.

- Traveling to Adi Da Samrajashram, His Island Ashram, for my first sighting of my Beloved Guru and my first Meditation Retreat in His Divine Company

This excerpt describes one of my first sightings of my Guru in His physical form. It occurred during my first retreat at His principal Ashram Hermitage in Fiji in 1989.

"One morning our Guru wished to speak to all of the devotees at the Ashram, and He invited us to come and sit with Him. Formally we entered the Temple and quietly waited for His arrival. Sitting in meditation, I began to perceive gentle waves of energy and light washing through the space of the Temple. As my Guru approached, the waves became stronger, and after a while I felt them pervade my body and cells, opening the heart chakra, and relaxing yet straightening the body spontaneously in response.

I began to swoon in the sheer beauty of the Love-Bliss that was carried on the waves of His Spiritual transmission. This was the essence of Spiritual relationship! He entered the room and took His seat. We bowed our heads to the floor, swooning in His Love, our hearts overflowing in love for Him.

Sitting silently at first, He gazed at each one of us, radiating His force of Love. Then He began to address us.

He spoke of the strength of intention required by the practitioner, for the Spiritual process to be truly effective. He reflected that to be transformative in effect, our practice would require everything of us. Then He asked us why we had come to Him, as his devotees. What were we looking for in coming to Him?

Eager for the opportunity to speak with him, and unable to hold myself back, I jumped to my feet. As His eyes turned to me, I found myself as if in a bubble of liquid love, in which only He and I seemed to exist. I confessed my love to Him, and responded to His question as best I could.

“Beloved Guru, I thank you for this opportunity to speak with you, and for all the gifts that you have given to me.”

As I spoke, my Spiritual Teacher looked deeply into me, and I felt that He saw every particle of my being. I felt there was no separation between us.

I continued, “I am only newly entered into devotional relationship with You, and am only just beginning the practice of the way that You have given to us, but Your profound gifts of transformation and Divine love are growing and healing me. I can’t say that I feel prepared for real seriousness in my practice, but I feel strongly moved in response to Your Divine beauty and to the exquisite relationship of heart-Communion with You.”

A delightful and humorous exchange followed, in which He teased me playfully, using my confession as opportunity for further admonishing for all of the devotees present. He finished by asking me a question.

“You expect that your life will work out, don’t you?”

“I do expect that my life will work out!” I replied, a little indignantly. In those days, I was convinced that it would.

He smiled, and infinite compassion reflected in His beautiful eyes. He said, “You cannot require conditional existence to fulfill you. It is not about fulfillment! It is inherently about death. You must feel the reality that everyone and everything that you love will be lost. The only hope that you have for real happiness is in the unconditional, in the Divine Reality. That is the happiness you must find, if you want to be truly happy.”

I left this remarkable occasion, a changed woman. I felt that karmas that had been deeply embedded in my psyche for lifetimes had been washed away by Light. By the end of the meditation retreat I felt I had received more gifts than I could count. I continued to receive further Blessing as a result of the occasions of spiritual relationship with my Guru, over the following twelve months in particular, but ongoing in my life over the seven years before my next meditation retreat in His company."